Future Proof
by Xandrolar1
Summary: Okaies, after seeing the Children in Need special, I decided to see if I could expand it a little.  Hopefully you'll all find it funny, and a little escape from the rigours of work.  Please read and review :D
1. Chapter 1

Merlin

Future proof

Part 1

Nimueh looked into the scrying font, that served as her looking glass, watching as Prince Arthur and the twit Merlin spoke about something, slowly she moved her hand over the font, seeing Gaius and Uther sitting together papers on the table between them, before with another wave, changing the Image to the Lady Morgana and her serving maid, all of them looking happy. She snarled, looking out of the window, at the falling snow, then she smiled.

"tis the season of goodwill" she muttered. Then she waved her hand over the font, the water beginning to boil. Finally she stopped, staring at the image before her, showing a dank, dark future of strange buildings and horseless carts.

"Argoose" she muttered, then frowned, waving her hand again. "Argos" she read again. Then she smiled, before she vanished. The room went deathly silent then she reappeared, picking up her purse and pulling out her credit card.

"Don't leave home without it" she muttered before she vanished again.

Two days later…

"Oh come on Arthur, yuletide isn't _that_ bad" said Merlin as he made the bed while the prince dressed for the day. Arthur poked his head out, looking at Merlin.

"Really? All it is, is a pointless display of cheer in a time where there are no crops the rivers and lakes are frozen, it gets dark before bedtime and its freezing out" Arthur said. "I see no reason to be cheery about it" he said, his head vanishing again "and its dark out and I'm awake! Where's the justice?" he called.

"Your father likes it" Merlin said.

"My father likes to act the good benefactor to the people once a year-" Arthur said, then poked his head out again. "-it's a popularity thing"

"yes, and he does need help with that" agreed Merlin.

"What was that?"

"oh, nothing, just thinking aloud, ermm Arthur, what is that thing?" Merlin asked Frowning. Arthur stuck his head out again, frowning.

"What is what?" he asked. Merlin pointed to the corner of the room where a little white socket with three holes had appeared on the wall.

"That" he said. Arthur stepped forwards, scratching his head.

"I have no idea" he admitted. "it wasn't there yesterday" he said. Merlin rolled his eyes.

"Really, I didn't notice" he said, sarcastically. Arthur nodded and picked up his sword.

"Yes well, that's why you're the prat and I'm the prince" he said proudly, stepping past him with his sword. Merlin blinked, running a hand down his face.

"You never get my sarcasm" he muttered, frowning as Arthur approached the thing that had appeared.

"Be careful, you don't know what kind of creature it is" Merlin cautioned. Arthur narrowed his eyes at it.

"well its not doing anything" he said. "Maybe its asleep" he added. Then slowly put the tip of his sword into the bottom left hole. Nothing.

"Maybe its dead" said Merlin walking over and keeling down, examining it"

"Maybe" agreed Arthur. Merlin tilted his head then saw a little switch that had 'off' and 'on' engraved on it.

"wonder what this does" said Merlin flicking it. There was a loud pop, Arthur flew back and the room plunged into darkness.

"Arthur are you ok?" asked Merlin looking around in the darkness.

"Merlin… why did you turn the candles off?" he asked from somewhere to his left. Merlin turned to the sound stepped forwards then tripped over him, knocking his head on the bed. Slowly he got up rubbing his head as the candles turned back on above them.

"And you said it was dead" Arthur said, unaware that his normally neat hair was now standing on end. "Come on we should make sure no one else has these things here" he added, standing up.

"But Arthur…" said Merlin

"no time Merlin, people may be in danger!" Arthur yelled running out, sword in hand.

"Your hair?" Merlin said, before running after him, noticing that there was another of the white boxes just outside the door.

He followed Arthur to the great hall where, upon entering he stopped short seeing Uther and Gaius puzzling over squat red cylinder with two eyes, a grin and a helmet that said 'HENRY' on its head.

"What is blazes is that?" asked Arthur stepping forwards. Uther looked from it to him, then back to the box, before doing a double take at his son.

"What happened to you?" Uther asked. Arthur tilted his head confused as Merlin ran in.

"What?" Arthur asked.

"Ermm.. I believe Uther is complimenting your hair" said Gaius.

"My hair?" asked Arthur picking up a metal tray, looking into it, eyes going wide.

"MERLIN!" he roared turning around, Merlin's eyes went wide as he ran back out.

"I was trying to tell you!" he called back. Uther and Gaius looked at each other, shaking their heads.

"So, Henry, from what land are you?" asked Uther, looking into the grinning face, it remained silent.

"oh!" said Gaius eyes wide. Uther looked at him.

"It has a three pronged tail" Gaius said pulling the tail, the Henry not giving any indication it minded.

"Demon!" Uther spat, drawing his sword.

"A very long three pronged tail" said Gaius.

"Look at its head" whispered Uther. Gaius stopped pulling the tail and looked, seeing nothing, then looking at Uther.

"it turned" Uther stated as Arthur walked back in, Merlin behind him rubbing the back of his neck, Morgana and Gwen a moment later.

"Eww what is that thing?" asked Gwen, stopping short.

"This is Henry" said Gaius.

"Henry, the Lady Morgana and her servant, Gwen" Gaius introduced. Henry said nothing.

"Talkative, isn't he" muttered Arthur, as the top began to spin where Gaius pulled the tail again.

"Ohh I don't think he likes that" said Gwen. Gaius stopped and looked up.

"What? doesn't like what?" he asked.

"That thing where you pull his tail" said Gwen.

"Maybe that's how he talks?" said Morgana. Merlin frowned and walked past her taking the tail and looking at the end of it.

"Arthur look at this" he said. Arthur moved over to him, frowning.

"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" Arthur asked.

"If its about breakfast then yes" said Merlin. Arthur sighed and took the tail, looking around, his eyes lighting up when he saw one of the magical boxes on the wall. He pulled the tail over to it and then pushed it into the socket.

"it fits!" he said proudly. The group turning back to Henry.

"I don't like its nose" whispered Gwen. Morgana looked at her and stepped forwards.

"Well I think he's cute-ish" she said, leaning forwards. "besides he's so different from us, he's probably scared is all", she said, her dress brushing the end of his nose.

"So what did that do?" asked Uther, looking at Gaius. The man shrugged.

"I have no idea" he said.

"there's a small tome in its house here" said Merlin, looking through the box, pulling out the instructions. "Also a lot of weapons, some of which are brushes" he added. Then turned and handed the instructions to Gaius who laid them out on the table, examining them.

"Well?" asked Uther, the others watching.

"Its difficult to decipher my lord" Gaius said.

"No wonder, they're upside down" said Arthur, standing next to his Father.

"Sire, you're on the other side of the table, they _would_ be upside down to you" Gaius pointed out.

"It says here, Green for intensity, red for power" Merlin said, looking over Gaius's shoulder.

"Well, press the red one then" said Uther. Gaius reached forwards, then pulled back.

"We have no idea what that will do" Gaius said at length, Morgana leant closer to Henry, which was when Merlin leant past Gaius and pressed the red button. Henry roared, and Morgana screamed as it began to eat her dress, up its nose.

"Good lords!" exclaimed Gaius.

"Kill it!" yelled Arthur. Gaius reached over and slammed the green switch, and the roar grew and Morgana screamed higher as it ate more of her dress.

"the red one!" yelled Merlin slamming it. Henry went quiet and Morgana pulled her dress free, looking at Henry, eyes wide.

"That… tried to eat me!" she yelled.

"You attacked a member of my house, there can be only one course of action!" Uther roared at it.

"You will be executed at dawn by beheading" he announced, then with a flurry walked out of the room. The group looked at each other, but it was Merlin who spoke up.

"I hate to point this out, but won't it be difficult to behead something with no body?" Slowly everyone turned to look at him.

"Just saying is all" he said with a cheesy grin.

Merlin rushed down the steps to where the Great Dragon was situated, running into the cavern beneath the castle. The Dragon was already waiting, but it had two really long pieces of string stuffed into its ears, its eyes were closed, and its head was bopping. Merlin looked around the floor seeing hundreds of broken little flat boxes on the ground. He looked back at the Dragon.

"Errr Hello!" he called. The Dragon continued bopping its head. "yoo hoo!" Merlin called again, the dragon opened one eye looking at him.

"Ahhh, young Warlock, happy yuletide!" he greeted.

"Yeah, about that… what are you doing?"

"ooo best part" said the Dragon, closing its eyes, lifting its head bopping along happily.

"You do realise how disturbing that is right?" Merlin muttered.

"Man this stuff is happening!" exclaimed the Dragon, looking back at Merlin.

"now what do you want?" he asked.

"Right, its like this there are these, things appearing around Camelot, we got someone called Henry trying to eat Morgana, little white boxes that keep shocking Arthur, and now this!" Merlin said. He waited. Then sighed. "when your done" he said.

"Oh sorry, you were saying" said the Dragon. Merlin shook his head looking around.

"Doesn't matter, what… are all these?" Merlin asked gesturing to the piles of broken boxes.

"They're called I-Pods" said the dragon. "They make music" he explained.

"Why are they broken?" he asked.

"Merlin, have you seen the size of the play button?" asked the Dragon. Merlin picked one up.

"Yeah and?" he said. The Dragon lifted up its claw.

"Now try pressing it with this" he said. Merlin blinked.

"Mad, your all mad" he muttered. The Dragon sighed and pooped one of the pieces of string from its ear.

"here listen" said the Dragon. Merlin took it and put it in his ear.

"I'm you biggest fan, I'll follow you untill you love me.. papa paparazzi" the dragon said in tune, as he and Merlin nodded their heads to the beat, Merlin blinking then pulling the earphone out.

"What is that?" he asked.

"The song, its by some royal person.. the screen says it a Lady Ga ga" it said.

"No, I meant the stuff on this" he said holding up the ear phone.

"Just some earwax" the Dragon replied. Merlin nodded, then grimaced.

"Be a good fellow and pop it back in would you" said the Dragon leaning down. Merlin Grimacing as he did so.

"Okay, well I can see you're not going to be of much help" said Merlin turning away.

"Oh, you could do me one small favour" said the Dragon looking at him.

"What's that?" asked Merlin.

"Put song four on repeat, I like that one" it said. Merlin blinked and picked up the I pod.

"Sure, whatever you say" he said. Then, the Dragon satisfied he left the cavern.

Uther was walking past his chambers when he heard the familiar roar of Henry from inside. Grabbing his sword from its holster, he slammed the door open, blinking as he man servant ran the brush on Henry's nose along the drapery.

"Peter?" asked Uther, Peter turned and the bowing pressed the red button, shutting henry up.

"Sire" he said.

"What are you doing with that…. Thing?" he asked.

"What Henry?" asked Peter confused. "Cleaning sire" he said.

"Cleaning? With Henry?" Uther asked.

"Yes sire, Henry is my magic sucker" he announced proudly. Uther opened his mouth to respond, then blinked.

"You really didn't say that" he said, then he closed the door, leaving a confused Peter there.

"What was that all about?" asked Peter. Henry didn't reply.


	2. Chapter 2

Merlin

Future Proof

Part 2

Merlin, having gotten nowhere with the Great Dragon decided on a different approach, so as he entered the Pharmacy he frowned as his nose was assaulted with a strong smell. There was a soft whir from the bench where the bowls usually sat, and a strange glowing box on it.

"Ahh there you are" said Gaius grinning.

"Gaius, what's that smell?" asked Merlin stepping down. Gaius lifted up an empty flat box, turning it around.

"Toad in the hole!" he said with a grin.

"it stinks" Merlin said.

"Smells alright to me, besides I got you this" he said holding up a box. "Chicken Tikka masala" he said. Merlin frowned and looked at it.

"What is it?" he asked.

"Don't know but I know you like hot food, and this is three peppers" he announced. "oh and we have poppadum's!" he said. Merlin nodded and then sat down as the white box dinged. Gaius opened it pulling out the dinner, before popping Merlin's in. Ten minutes later the box dinged again, Gaius pulling the meal out.

"here you go" he said placing the meal in front of Merlin.

"smells delicious" Merlin agreed. Gaius nodded and then took the lid off a little plate.

"Poppadum?" he asked. Merlin took one and crunched into it.

Merlin walked into Arthur's chambers, hearing a clicking noise as he closed the door.

"Arthur?" he called out.

"Not now Merlin", I'm busy" said Arthur. Merlin walked around to Arthur's desk seeing him hunched over a small screen, his face lit up. Slowly Merlin went around watching a tiny man running around on it killing things. Merlin slowly tilted his head.

"What is that?" he asked.

"World of Warcraft" Arthur announced.

"Oh…" Merlin replied, as if it explained everything.

"Prince Art Er? your character is called prince Art Er?" Merlin said.

"Yes, Prince Arthur was taken" he said sadly.

"what's that?" asked Merlin.

"What's what?" Arthur replied.

"That, little thing there" Merlin said.

"Oh, that's a Gnome" Arthur said. Merlin blinked then turned away.

"Who's that?" asked Arthur, Merlin turned back to see a Green skinned evil looking thing, promptly dispatch Arthur's character.

"Ha! You died" said Merlin with a grin.

"Ut Er? I get killed by an ork called Ut Er?" Arthur said. "That is SO unfair!" he shouted.

In his chambers Uther let out a manic giggle as his Ork stood over Art Er's corpse. A moment later loads of characters streamed towards him and he was dead in an instant. He slammed his fist on the table.

"That is SO unfair!" he shouted.

Merlin sighed and tapped Arthur on the shoulder.

"We need to talk" he said.

"Later Merlin, I want to get to level ten" Arthur said.

"But…"

"later" he said again. Merlin sighed and left the chambers.

"What is that strange smelling product?" asked Morgana as Gwen tended to her after her bath. Gwen smiled.

"Just a bit of product" she said, "Can't have you going around with cold lifeless locks now can we?"

"No indeed, that would be terrible" Morgana agreed. Gwen nodded, holding up what looked like a strange fat weapon, turning it on, hot air blew out and Gwen tended to Morgana's hair.

"Going anywhere nice on holiday this year?" Gwen called out.

"The usual, trip round the kingdom with Uther" Morgana replied. "Two weeks of banquets sweaty men and too much drink" she added, as the door opened, and Merlin stepped in. The two women turned to him, Gwen turning off the hair dryer.

"Can we help you?" Morgana asked.

"Actually, yes" Merlin said with a nod, stepping into the room. "It's these, devices, whatever they are, they're bad" he said, frowning at a shrill trilling noise. "What's that?" he asked. Morgana frowned and Gwen quickly ran to her hold all pulling out a small object, putting it to her ear.

"Hell, Gwen's hair care, Gwen speaking" she said happily. She nodded and looked around.

"Parchment?" she mouthed. Morgana handed her some and a quill. Gwen smiled as she took it.

"Yes… okay…No I can't do Monday. Tuesday's free" she announced. Merlin shook his head and stepped back out of the room.

The following Morning everyone was gathered back in the audience chamber.

"This must be some kind of evil enchantment" said Merlin.

"For once I agree" said Uther. "And the source must be found" he added. "Arthur, this must of course fall to you" Uther said.

"But I was meant to raid tonight" Arthur moaned.

"Really? Ragnaros or Litch king?" asked Uther.

"Ragna- how do you know that?" Arthur said. Uther blinked and looked away.

"You're Ut Er?" Arthur shouted.

"Sire's please, can we get back on-" Gaius began cut off by the shrill tone of Gwen's phone again.

"sorry" she whispered, answering it.

"Gwen's hair care, Gwen speaking" she said, then frowned. "Ermm of course" she said, then handed the phone to Uther. "its for you" she said. Uther took it and held it up.

"Uther, yes this is he. I see. Goodbye" he said then handed the phone back to Gwen.

"Well?" asked Morgana. Uther shrugged.

"He said Seven Days" Uther said, then he looked at Gwen. "Where did you get that?" he asked.

"It was on my dresser when I woke up yesterday" she said. Uther nodded then looked at the others.

"Yes, well as I was saying, Arthur, you must find the source of this enchantment and remove it" Uther said.

"Okay" Arthur said, turning and walking out.

"I'll take your place in the raid" said Merlin. Arthur walked back in and grabbed him.

"You will be coming with me" he said, pulling him out, Morgana and Gwen following a moment later.

Gaius and Uther looking at each other, before the physician bowed and left. Uther waited until the door closed before pulling the laptop from under the table and turning it on.

Nimueh watched with a smile as Camelot began to fall apart.

"Oh this truly is the season of giving" she said with a smile. Then frowned as her phone rang. She picked it up, and answered it.

"Hello? Yes… I paid by card. Yes… no, no insurance, household insurance? Do you cover collapsing ruins?. Yes.. Isle of the Blessed. What do you mean never heard of it. No its not near Guernsey, wait, where is Guernsey?, oh no then. Albion. Yes… yes… No… so you cover ruins as long as they're part of the mainland? That's a bit harsh isn't it? Really? Well happy Christmas to you too muppet" she snarled slamming the phone closed. Then she sighed. "What is Christmas" she said. Then she frowned, seeing Arthur and Merlin leaving the castle.

"Now what are you two doing?" she wondered, watching aloud, when her phone rang again.

"What?" she asked. "oh hi mum, no still here on the Isle of the blessed, how's the dog?" she asked, "oh one second!" she said, pressing the hold button and looking back at Merlin and Arthur.

"okay, you two. Where was I?" she thought for a second. Then frowned at the scrying font.

"Now what are you two doing?" she said. Then with a smile waved her hand over the font, the slowly falling snow becoming a blizzard.

"Let's see you get far in that" she muttered, then her eyes widened, she lifted up the phone.

"Sorry mum, oh you know, Princes to kill, Uther to break the usual. Gods mum I know its been over twenty years, I'm just taking time to adjust to my anger!" she said.

"Arthur, this is not natural" muttered Merlin as the pair of them trudged forwards through the snow.

"Welcome to yuletide!" Arthur called back. "Do you still like it?" he snapped.

"This part, no" Merlin said. "And also where do we even look?" he asked. Arthur stopped moving and looked at him.

"Why am I the answer man?" he snapped.

"Ohhh sorry" Muttered Merlin, getting a snowball in his face for his sarcasm.

"We need to find shelter, or something until this passes" Arthur said. "Where though?" he asked. Then he turned to see Merlin walking into the Tavern.

"I honestly thought we'd gotten further than here" Arthur muttered as he followed Merlin in.

The Dragon was bored, having broken the last of its I pods. So now it was amusing itself other ways, a small mobile was on the ground in front of it, and it squinted down at the screen, pressing down on the contact list. It got to the name it wanted then pressed dial. There was a brrrr brrrrr… brrrrr brrrrrr

"Hello?" Uther's voice sounded over it.

"Hi There, I'm calling from endangered animals, we've recently done a poll of Camelot and have been told you have a Dragon under your castle is this true?" it said. _Click._

"How rude" muttered the Dragon. Then it went down the list again, dial, brrrr brrr… brrrr

"Hi you've reached the Lady Morgana, I'm not here at the moment but leave your name and a message and I'll call you right back! _beeep_"

"Seven Days" click. "now… ahh!" brrrr brrrr… brrrrr

"This is Prince Arthur's phone, my master is busy at the moment, making my life hell, _Merlin__!_ so leave a message after the whatsit and he'll probably get me to call you back (shuffle) Arthur, I Can't find it! _Find what?_ The button to stop recording – oh. BEEP".

"Arthur you have been selected as Royal Prat of the year, as voted by us the population of the land! Congratulations! And stop picking on Merlin" Click. "hmmmm" brrrrr brrrrrr brrrrrrr

"Hi Gwens hair care, Gwen speaking"

"YOU LEFT ME BALD ! WHAT DID YOU DO TO ME!" Click. "heh heh heh…." Brrrr brrrr brrrr

"Camelot Pharmacy, Gaius the court physician"

"I'm calling from the Red Cross, are you aware that your license to practice medicine ran out a hundred years ago you old fart!" Click. "ahh" Ring ring… "Hmmm?"

"Hello the Great Dragon speaking"

"Not as old as you. you mothballed flying lizard!" Click. The Dragon blinked, then became aware that the remains of the I Pods were vanishing from around him.

"Now what's this?" he wondered.

1000 years later…..

Colin and Bradley were in the queue to pick their items up from the collection point when there was a rush of air and a woman appeared in front of them, storming over to the customer service desk.

"Talk about rude" muttered Colin. Bradley nodding in agreement, behind them Katie doing the same.

"Like she owns the place or something" she muttered.

"What do you mean no refunds? I bought three hundred Ipods for crying out loud, its not my fault they're broken!" she was screaming. The attendant shook his head at her.

"We don't refund on damaged goods" he said.

"I'll damage you in a bloody minute!" she snarled.

"Easy there, he's just doing his job" shouted Bradley.

"Yeah, how'd you manage to break three hundred IPods anyway?" Colin agreed. Nimueh whirled around her eyes going wide.

"Oh you have got to be kidding me, what have I got to do to get away from you two!" she yelled, then with a flourish vanished in a whirlwind of magical energy.

"Good effects" said Katie.

"There's something familiar about her" said Colin. He looked at Bradley, then shrugged.

"Naaaaa" they both said.

"you sure Richard will like the slippers?" asked Katie.

_Back in Camelot_

"So instead of finding the source of this enchantment you two end up half arsed at the Tavern!" yelled Uther.

"That.. waah my fault _Hic" _Merlin said raising a hand.

"Yepsh, is fault" Agreed Arthur, staggering next to him. Merlin grinned.

"He alwash blames me"

"Yesh" agreed Arthur.

"I would say half arsed wasn't strong enough a word" muttered Gaius.

"Itsh not like we didn't not try" slurred Arthur.

"If we didn't not try that means we didn't I think" said Merlin sagely, waving a finger at him. Arthur squinted and went to grab it, only succeeding in falling forwards, taking Merlin with him. Uther rolled his eyes then picked Arthur up sitting him on a chair, Gaius giving him a nasty glare as he tried to lift Merlin. Once they were both seated Uther went to the percolator in the corner of the room pouring two cups of coffee, he moved back to the table handing one to Arthur, Merlin held his hand out, but Uther looked away sipping at it. Merlin slumped down with a thump. Gaius cleared his throat, and Uther turned.

"what?" he asked. Gaius indicated the coffee, then Merlin. Uther looked at it then sighed, placing it in front of him

"Tank you" Merlin said grabbing it. Suddenly Arthur jolted up arms wide.

"Happy Yuletide!" he yelled, then screamed as the chair fell back with a crash, Uther and Gaius wincing. Slowly Uther sank into his seat, aware of Merlin looking at him. Merlin smiled and gave a drunken wave. Uther blinked, and sighed.

"I don't know whether to laugh, cry or have them executed" he admitted.

"Any of those would hurt at the moment" said Arthur from the floor. Slowly Uther put his head to the table and thumped it slowly.

_Thud.. Thud… Thud. _

"Ow… ow… ow" Merlin replied, wincing. Slowly Uther sat up, then frowned as his phone rang.

"Uther, and before you ask, yes we have a dragon, no I'm not letting him go, no I don't want windows, carpets a loan or a satellite TV"

"Hello Uther, I hope you're enjoying your gifts" Nimueh replied pleasantly.

"You?" said Uther standing.

"Tis the season to give gifts, I just hope you realise how good these Gifts are" she said.

"We want nothing from you!" he roared.

"Too late, Camelot is so enamoured of these things it will become lazy, fat and ripe for conquest" she said. "Hope you enjoy yourselves" Click.

"Sire?" asked Gaius. Uther looked up at him. We must destroy them, all of these infernal things!" he said.

"That may take quite a while for us to round them up" Gaius admitted.

"I'll have Arthur take as many guards as needed, these… things burn tomorrow!" Uther said.

1000 years later…..

They had maybe moved one step in the queue when there was a massive blast of wind.

"Not again" muttered Katie, as the woman reappeared. She walked up to the customer service desk again.

"Hi" said Nimueh with a smile. The person behind the counter looked up at her.

"you again"

"Yep it's me again, look this time it really isn't my fault, it was a fire, a large fire" she said.

"A fire?" he asked, eyebrow raised.

"Yes"

"and where was it? This fire?" he asked.

"In the courtyard, where else?" she said.

"You had a fire in the courtyard?"

"No, the people I gave the gifts too" she said.

"Uh huh" he said nodding.

"Look we're both busy people, can't we just you know, refund my money and I can leave"

"No"

"what! Why!"

"Because we don't refund on faulty good, as I stated"

"You'll need to refund your nose in a minute you pox ridden toad!" she yelled. Behind them Katie sighed.

"Hold this please" she said handing her shopping bag to Bradley., he took it and she stormed over to the annoying woman.

"Hey you!" she shouted. Nimueh turned to her and Katie decked her.

"Show some respect and get in line!" she yelled, to the applause of people around her. Nimueh blinked twice, then slowly got up.

"I knew there was a reason I hated you" she sneered, before vanishing. Katie nodded in satisfaction and walked back to Colin and Bradley, both standing there open mouthed.

"Remind me never to get on your bad side outside of filming" said Colin. Katie just smiled as the queue moved forwards again.

1000 years earlier.

"So everything has been disposed of?" asked Uther.

"Everything father" said Arthur. Uther nodded, pleased.

"Well then, perhaps we can get back to the matter of yuletide" Uther said. Arthur frowned.

"May I just point out, that if it wasn't for this whole Yuletide thing, none of this would have happened?" Arthur said. Gaius and Merlin both looked at him. Slowly Uther stood up.

"Merlin" he said. Merlin stepped forwards as Uther handed him his sword.

"Happy yuletide. Arthur… run" Uther said said. Merlin turned to Arthur. And Arthur bolted from the room, aware that Uther and Gaius were both laughing. Slowly the laughter died down, and Uther sat down.

"It is fortunate you were spared this foul enchantment" said Gaius, suddenly looking around as something began to ring.

"indeed" agreed Uther, standing, holding up his hand.

"This is Uther. You were CC'd on the email!" he yelled. Gaius's eyes going wide. "Yes, thank you.. goodbye" Uther said closing the phone, then turning back to Gaius.

"What?" he asked.

"I don't believe it" Gaius replied.

"No mum I'm fine, I'll get her back, no they wouldn't refund the presents. How much? Ermmm? £45,456, _HOW MUCH!_ Its okay its covered, well it will be once Uther is rid of. Yes mum I'll try to behave. Ok bye bye, love to snookums _WOOF_ " with a sigh she sat down, closing the phone. Then frowned as it rang.

"Nimueh, last high priestess" she answered.

"One two Kilgharrah's coming for you, three four, better lock your door"

Click.

"Stupid Dragon"

End

**Well there you go, hope you all enjoyed it, and the small cameo's I added. I know it was short, but it was never meant to be a long story anyway. Anyways, HAPPY CHRISTMAS!**

"Stupid Writer"


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